Laduree Recipe Book + Surgery Cancellation

So the surgery has postponed for two weeks. My 3 times blood test shows that I am pregnant. How strange when I know that I am not pregnant, it must have been an error during the test, somewhere ! 

We went home and I felt so tired from getting up very early morning at 5:00 am that morning so I went to bed immediately. I felt the rush of relief from thinking by now I should have been in the ICU with big surgery scar on my stomach feeling groggy with strong sedation in me. I know exactly how it feels since I was there 8 years a go. But nothing has happened to me right now, well at least not until 2 weeks time.

I was floating in my own mind between a sleep and waking up trying to relax when Steven walked in through the door. He finally came into the bedroom and handed out this pretty little soft greenish book and put in front of my face and on the  bed. I knew it was the Laduree recipe book that he ordered for me. I flipped the pages looking at the pretty pictures and said 'thank you' to him for buying it for me.

I love the small gesture from Steven, and the pretty little book that I own now making me happy and made my life more beautiful in the middle of this health situation. Steven knows I love Laduree and their macarons so he wants me to treasure the pretty book.

I love how I feel about my life now even though I have this time bomb monster in my body that needs to be fixed. Perhaps the surgery and what has happened with my health for the past  8 years has something to do with what I feel. Life is so precious now and small things became dramatically beautiful and meaningful.

I won't lie that I have my up and down moments but I feel the big change about my out look toward life. I am more happy toward simple things and cherish our peaceful life together. I feel like I am the luckiest person a live given the condition of my health, been divorced and far away from my own country, family and my only son. I can see the big picture of my life that I am destined and grateful to be here and as they say "everything happened for a reason." It sounds a bit cliche but I like the phrase. With a strong believe and determination I like to believe that something good will happen to me in the future.

Laduree, Sucre  available at Amazon.com

I am in awe to have received emails, card, phone calls of 'prayers' and 'wishing me well' from relatives and friends. These wishes and prayers can only make me even stronger facing the up coming surgery. And I will take those prayers and wishes to the surgical room with me.

From the bottom of my heart, "Thank you so much, and you have moved me in a way that you can not imagine and made me even stronger, thank you!"

Now I have 2 weeks in front of me to blog, be happy and enjoy a normal life with Steven and perhaps my son and my parents will be coming to visit us.

********

Thank you for reading !